What I Know

What I know 

I see your dark lashes when you sleep

 And love the soft turns of your body

 I know the feel of your lips

 And the lilt of your shy laugh

 But there is more

 More I have felt and heard

 I can hear your grandpa speaking

 About the wisdom of condoms 

Feel the touch of your brother

 As he sought a current in your small arm

 I know the joy of your escapades in another man’s arms

 Of the good days and the heartache 

And how your children make you glow

 How their sight and smell are burned deep

 The easy grace of motherhood on you

 I know how you move your legs

 Under the dinner table, fighting nerves 

I know your memories

 see a sad mother Suffering the greatest loss imaginable

 Know how you were smart but lost

 I know how you use books like blankets

 Covering your pain and soothing your spirit

 I know how your eyes light when watching Drama

 and the tears that drift quietly When your heart overflows

 I know how the word touches your soul

 It is where I want to go, to find you

 I know you sometimes love me like a supernova

 But I also know there are days that I do not exist,

 buried in the sadness

 Just a seed, waiting to germinate again

 I understand why others fantasize 

About the dark beauty with the kind eyes

 I know how you suffered on lonely nights

 Wishing it was different, wanting something

 I know your soul is restless

 Your heart is purple sweet with love 

I know I love you beyond reason

 Beyond the bounds of my own imagination

 But I know you may not always believe plain words

 I know you may turn away from me someday

 I know today is not that day I know today is not that day